Perhaps you have been listening to your directees for quite some time on the phone, but if you haven’t, may I offer some thoughts, as this is the simplest alternative for us now that we aren’t able to be physically with each other.

I think, keeping it simple, using a way of communicating which is simple, is at the heart of the matter. To enable us to listen with our mind, body and soul. Personally, I wouldn’t use Skype or Zoom for one-to-one spiritual direction, because of the questions around safety and security.

First of all, I think a good, stable connection (it might be a landline) is essential and also offers freedom from distraction for both the Spiritual Director and Directee.

The first meeting on the phone is like the first meeting with any new directee – offering some guidelines. So if I am not using a video/Facetime facility, I will say a few words about my surroundings at home: “I’m sitting by the window looking into the garden. Beside me I have a small table with a vase of spring flowers and a candle.” There has always been a reciprocal sharing but don’t worry if not. This is a choice into freedom for the directee.

You may want to pray at the beginning of the meeting, which quite naturally leads into some silence. Then after that, here is the opportunity to mention that any pause that the directee would like to make is also for them to bring to an end. I will be waiting for them, as I would if I could see them. In fact, I have heard that introverted preference people have said that the telephone pauses are much less threatening and there is a greater freedom in not being seen. I was told the other day that the freedom to get up and move around was absolutely life-giving.

I always ask the directee to stop me if I’m moving too fast whilst they may be taking notes.

A very experienced Spiritual Director also told me that her height – she is very tall – is not a distraction any more for her directees.

Another said that the time saved in not having to travel on crowded transport was indeed a blessing for her.

As boundaries of all sorts are changing, people are already offering a listening ear on the phone, not only to family and friends, but also to their directees in between scheduled meetings.

I wonder if you have found other blessings of  Spiritual Direction on the phone both for you and for others? If so, and you would like to share them, please email SEN@spiritualexercisesnetwork.uk